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ur mom hands u a glass of orange juice. u take a sip. its not orange juice. its stirred egg yolks. u spit them all out. u ask ur mom why. she turns around. its not ur mom. its me. ur mom is gone. im ur mother now

these old spice commercials have been getting really crazy lately 

Posted: 6 months ago with 182,295 notes - VIA: yoruiichi - SOURCE: tukut - Reblog?


leo could be the only nominee in the category and he would still lose

アルミン | snkr

Posted: 6 months ago with 32,556 notes - VIA: araragii - SOURCE: i-am-entei - Reblog?


easter is on 4/20 this year are you gonna blaze it or praise it

 By that time Sophie had swept and scrubbed herself into a state when she could hardly move. She was sitting hunched up in the chair, aching all over. Michael took hold of Howl by a trailing sleeve and towed him over to the bathroom, where Sophie could hear him pouring out complaints in a passionate mutter. Phrases like “terrible old biddy” and “won’t listen to a word!” were quite easy to hear, even though Calcifer was roaring, “Howl, stop her!She’s killing us both!”